Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Maybe I am just old fashioned

    So the hubby and I are laying in bed last night and he told me something interesting he heard on the radio while driving to work. Some lady called the station and said "I think stay at home mom's are an F-ing waste of time". Now I was appalled to think that someone would actually think that. So I am going to tell you all why I have chosen to stay home and I would love to hear everyone else's reasons too!

     I first quit my job to stay home when my husband and I got married. At the time his two children and my son lived with us. His son is autistic and we could not find after school care that we felt would actually do anything for him. This was in June and by the time school rolled around in August he was able to read, dress him self (as long as there are no buttons) brush his own teeth and shower with minimal help. He was also starting to show interest in making friends. So that alone was well worth giving up a career. Eventually my step kids moved back in with their mom and I realized there were more benefits than just helping my stepson. My own son started school and I was able to volunteer in his class. He was able to play soccer and all because I was no longer at work for most of the week. I then got pregnant and had my little princess. And let me just say that having so much time with her has been well worth the sacrifices. Everyday she learns new things and I am there to experience all of it. And it's not like I sit home and do nothing. I am helping my children become good people. Oh yeah and there is also all the cleaning, cooking, changing diapers, doctor and dentist appointments, and this time of year the added joy of shoveling. At the end of the day I feel blessed to be the one doing it all :) Oh and by the way I do not judge the working mom so please take no offense this is just my take on the stay at home mom!


Lindsey @ Confessions Of A Marine Wife said...

Hey there, name-twin!
I completely agree with you, staying at home with my handsome little boy is a joy and a blessing. At the moment, he is laying in his crib, watching the fan spin and laughing his little heart out. If I were not here to experience it, things would be dramatically different. He already barely knows his father (he is in Stumps for tech school), and if I weren't here...I dunno. I have always believed that my children deserve to know their parents. He is five months old, and I have been here everyday to witness everything that he has done or learned.

Just Another MilSpouse said...

haha, it's funny you called Amanda your name twin because you and I are also name twins (Lindsey) even spelled the same. We are a cool trio of bloggers I'd say, lol.

Anyway, as for the topic, I am a SAHM and have been since 96. My husband has always had a very traditional/old school way of thinking. He didn't want his wife to work. He wanted to support his family without help. We discussed it for a long time and in the end we agreed that I could get a job when we were done having kids and the youngest was no longer nursing plus daycare was so expensive I would have been working to pay for daycare with little to no money left over.

As time went on, we decided that I would stay at home until all three were in full day school.

Once that happened we realized that holding a job would prove difficult when the schools called with a sick kid, dr's appts, etc. It is also easier with me at home to get all the normal life stuff done; grocery shopping, mowing the lawn, etc.

I started school a few years ago so working now would just be too time consuming and would leave me with so little time to spend with the kids helping them with their homework or making dinner.

In addition to all these reasons there is also the military aspect of it. With him deploying and going on training the kids need to have a constant in their lives. They need to be able to talk to me when they are upset, they need to know that I am always here for them.

I will work someday, but for now it's best for us if I stay home.

I have gotten my fair share of "looks" from other people. I'm sure they are thinking "why is she not working, her youngest is 9 y/o" but I have to let it roll off my back. I'm doing what is best for my family, and besides, it makes my husband happy to know that he is the traditional Man of the house. Sure, extra money would be nice, but spending time with the kids is nicer.

Just my opinion.

Lindsey @ Confessions Of A Marine Wife said...

Oorah! Yes, the three of us basically rock. :]

Amanda M. said...

Pretty funny because I started this blog thinking oh great I will be writing to myself nobody wants to read about my crazy life! When you ad military wife and stay at home mom apparently what you get is a bunch of crazy bloggers. :)

Jessa said...

I've been at home for the better part of 11 years and wouldn't trade it for anything. I'm not only a SAHM/W, and a military wife, I'm bipolar on top of it. So I really am crazy. LOL My kids are in school full time, but they can do all the activities they want, I'm here if they are sick. Basically it's the best job ever.

Mrs. M said...

I like how you have all these name twins..well add me to the list! I'm also Amanda M. LOL

I found you through another blog (and now I'm following you) and I have to say that you should never have to justify why you stay home with your kids! I'm almost 29 weeks pregnant with our first and I plan to stay home with him until he starts school. (I'm also going to school, so I have something lined up for when that day comes.) It is what I want to do, and my husband wants me to do it too.

You're helping your kids get ready for when they need to go out into the world, and that is something that you should be thanked for, not scolded for!

cmswanlu2 said...

Its a little funny to me that anyone would have much to say about sahms. My husband and I are not so lucky to be able to afford this, so we both work. In a recent search for new day care I have been really shocked at the attitude I've been recieveing from some people. I work evenings and most weekends, and I seem to get this tone from a lot of ladies, when I asked about weekend care, as to say, why would you work, you should take care of your kids on the weekend. But that is one way I take care of my child. I love spending the day with her, I laugh threw most of the day, but I do also have to work to pay for our life as well. I could change jobs and work for little more then day care costs, or I can keep my job, work odd hours, and help better provide for my family.